Escapril Day 9: What’s the truth?

I constantly lie to my inner monologue—
I lose track.
What’s the truth?

I say I’m just busy,
That’s why I don’t try new projects or dreams.
The truth is I’m scared to try
And possibly miserably fail.

I say I didn’t see your message.
The truth is I’m burnt out—
I just wanted time to exist
without answering to anyone.

I say I’m tired of dating.
The truth is I like being single,
But I’m scared of getting hurt again,
So I ruin it first.
(even if I usually blame it on the same sh*tty men online.)

I say I’m fine,
But lately I’m not sure what that means.
I’m tired, burnt out, lonely—

So what’s the truth?